Years in the past, but not many…

randomegbert:

i… i tell jade that. my jade, that is. it would hurt her if i wasn’t ok, so i am.

Your hand rests behind your neck.

and sometimes, i actually mean it.

You smile a sad smile.

are you?

The way you phrase that, it sounds painfully clear that you aren’t.

You pause, voice wavering just a little bit.

You can talk to me, John.  I might not always understand, but I’ll always sympathize.

As for myself…sometimes, yes.  Most of the time, even.  I have so many things to be thankful for.

But other times, I can’t help but think that I was responsible not only for my own blindness, but for my Dave’s as well.  He didn’t deserve that, either, and my own sight loss serves as a constant reminder of the fact that I wrought the same on him.

…And, it feels selfish to say this, but I still miss being able to see.  I miss what I took for granted being able to do when I could still see.  I miss recognizing my friends, being able to see their smiles when they’re happy.

I don’t think I was ever prepared to go blind, because it all happened in one moment instead of being a gradual degeneration that allowed me to see it coming.

(Source : orphiste-blog)